I love old apartments EXCEPT the plumbing. Inevitably there is some faucet which abhors the laws of physics. Ah, the joy of turning the cold water up only to be scalded. So I turn hot water down only to be scalded even more. I turn the hot water up and experience the north pole! My shower defies mechanical engineers and daily I revisit Eddy Izzards rant about turny buttons that lie (start at 3:50). Mechanical engineers, I beg of you....WHY must your machines defy the laws of physics? Tell me it's pressure changes over time or faulty valves but these explanations fail to explain the consistency of machines that lie. I can replace the shower and still experience this frustrating phenomenon so common comics can use it to generate commensurate humorous experiences. Please get a grant to solve this!
It's this daily morning jiggling of knobs, attempting to find the 1mm where the temperature is perfect....this morning routine of wasting gallons of water avoiding freezing or burning my epidermis that starts my day. And of course, the urge to run through the house adorned with shampoo bubbles and towel wrapped tightly screaming "STOP USING TAPS! WHOSE USING TAPS?!?! KNOCK IT OFF!!!" This might scare my neighbors. But then, they aren't dealing with the fickle starship enterprise showerhead.
No comments:
Post a Comment